Growing Up

We're all standing in a row
In our Spice Girl finest
Arms folded
Lemonade stand
Making our first dollar

And they call us gawky, young
But never lazy
Chewing on our bubble gum
Looking at the boys like they're crazy
Maybe the jewelry is gaudy
But they still think we are the hotties
Independent girls
With our fake pearls
And giant hoop earrings

We're all standing in a row
Looking like Gwen Stefani
Holding on to cosmos
Grown ups in heels
Making deals
With our eyes and red lipstick
We still look at the boys like they're crazy
Through all the smoke that makes the room hazy
Bad ass chicks through and through
Knowing what our mamas taught us was true

Hardened hearts caused by the world
Searing thoughts; makes your head twirl
We traded in our sugar and spice
We don't have to settle to always being nice
Make 'em work for it
Make 'em talk for it
Make 'em show us they ain't the same old show
Make 'em say, "Baby one day you'll know"

Three women standing in a row
Looking like Audrey Hepburn
Hair up in twists
Sipping on martinis
One olive, two olive
No one is an alcoholic
But the men are all the same
And this lifestyle's getting lame
Trying to decipher who's real; who's not
And we simply, just simply got
To be moving along
Because our classiness doesn't belong

We've made 'em work for it
We've made 'em talk through it
They've said what they had to say
And it's the same thing anyway
It's alright if you want to stay and play
but we've got better places to be anyway
Yes, we always have better places to be anyway

Vulnerable ~Me

Creating the chaos
That accompanies my life in yours
And I found you there
Looking a little like a puppy
Lost and vulnerable
But oh, so beautiful

I couldn't tell any different
Because my eyes were filled with yours
And the tears were streaming and we were brought closer
In an instant
In a moment
In a prick of a needle
Our blood melded
Making us one
Making us none
None in a million

Could this be the beginning
Of something
Young, old, new, bold
Standing on the old soap box
Preaching that same old song
To the same people gullible enough to take it in

But I'm feeling love can only come once this lifetime
And I can't be all too sure it's our time
So I keep my struggles moving on
Until I have the perfect words to feel the beat of his song
And it's not getting any easier
With the timing always being off
But the sun I know will come back up
Even if it never rises for me
I always see it fade away
Past the ocean
Past the tides
Past this ache in my sides

And I found you there
Looking a little like a puppy
Lost and vulnerable
But oh, so beautiful

Walk By My Side

I'm trading this life for another mistake
Another empty hole in my chest
Just the right size for a bullet
I'm a piece of tender; a cutlet

Why are you so far away
In every way
And I need you to catch up
I need you to want the chase
But it's unfair of me
And I'm not that person
And you're not in the place to do any of the chasing

You have your own wounds
And there's no way for me to be your band aid
Not without needing a tourniquet of my own
At least you're honest
Even though I like clinging to the lie
Wishing you would hurry up
Catch up
And walk by my side

And I choose to be blind
Because it suits me
Until it bruises me
And then I'm left in my own wake
Knowing it's my own damn fault
A little shaken
A little worse for my wear
A bit much, some lonely
Seeking a quick fix; a remedy

And I question my motives
And I question the timing
And I question the tides
And I question yours
And I question mine

You have your own wounds
And there's no way for me to be your band aid
Not without needing a tourniquet of my own
At least you're honest
Even though I like clinging to the lie
Wishing you would hurry up
Catch up
And walk by my side

Spoons

The spoons are lying on the table
Face up
Untouched
Unloved
And I'm deep
I am deeper than you know

And I believe I miss people more than they miss me
Maybe it's just my sentimentality
For all the connections in this small world we make
For how many breaths we share
During the duration of a day
And how many of us just take and take

Standing at the end of the pavement
Looking down the street
Sullen girl with tangled hair
Wondering where her friends are
The tea party all ready
The spoons all shiny
Untouched
Unloved

Don't you know the end is near
So screams the homeless man at the end of the block
Maybe it's just the end of sanity
And I wonder what it would be like to be him
Smelly, nervous, always ranting a conspiracy theory
Doesn't know where his next meal will come from
But if he wouldn't soil my floor I would ask him to tea
Just can't have my mother mad at me

Baby blues scanning the rows of cars whizzing by
And I may give up soon
As the sun melts away
And I'm lonely again
For the birds are nesting and quieting down for a long nap
The ants are still busy
Too busy for me

The spoons are lying on the table
Face up
Untouched
Unloved
And I'm deep
I am deeper than you know

Happy Feet

Happy feet
Sing with me
Slide around on our socks
A child's play
A secret conversation
Whispered Giggles fill our senses

And I feel your arms around my waist
Hold me tight
Feeling my tiny frame
Skin so soft
Heart a melting rock
Pretty face
Stand in place
Admiration in both our eyes

And I know ultimately you have nothing to offer me now
But good food, warm bed, comical conversation
And maybe that's all we need
A fellow kindred spirit
Maybe that's all we need
An uncommon lyric

Maybe it's too soon
Hopefully not too late
And I want to demonstrate what I've learned
But I can't see you drifting
And giving my life any more meaning

Am I being foolish, letting you hold me?
Should I more easily pull away
But there's just something
Just something there
At the very edge
Scratching on the surface
Of my mushy brain
It's driving me insane
Because you are the highlight of my day

Happy feet
Sing with me
Guide me to that place
Look me face to face
Eye to eye; Toe to toe
See how our river will flow
Through mountains
Becoming ice
Solid
Firm
Cold
We don't always do as we're told

Our Garden

I tried, and I tried, and I tried
And there you came at the perfect moment
To bring this time into perspective
And I will miss it when we know each other better
And the newness wears off
Because the beginning is so exciting
And discovering each of your characteristics is such fun

So tell me when you saw me for the first time
Really saw me for who I was, not just the color of my eyes
Knew apple was my favorite juice
And the color of my giggle against your chest

I could go into hours of dialogue with you
And then we will not know where the minutes got lost
In a paper cup? In a tunnel deep? In the you and the me?

I could sing straight to your bones
Vibrate against your vertebrae.
Tell you the sweet nothings of this life that keeps traveling too quick for us to catch up
Do you like the way we move to the beat of a Russian drum
The sound that brings the world together

The garden growing the shrubs of love, intelligence, and freedom
Is where we take our walks
Where we share our best talks
Hand in hand
Spirit to Spirit
Soul to Soul
Toe to Toe

Don't ever change
Because if you were someone else
We would not have been drawn together
And then we would be apart, still trying to find our own way
Most likely still unhappy
But you make me happy in these few days of learning
But you make me happy with your listening, understanding
In our created garden growing love, intelligence, and freedom