Broken

This week a family friend died of cancer. She was like a mother to my little brother, and he is taking it super hard. My brother is 18. I got back from going to the after funeral last night. Having cried just with the thoughts of my brother losing a Mother to him. I have mentioned in my blog that my mother is not good at what she does and both Dylan and I have had our replacement mothers, though we love our biological mother. And his is gone. It breaks my heart for him. I plan on blogging about it at alittletalking... but this is a poem I wrote last night after everything was over. :)

Wishes that breathing came easier
That this whole world wasn't some jumbled mess
Could it make sense for even a moment

Why does it hurt so badly to show affections
before they can no longer be conveyed?
And the pain melts on me Like the colors of M&Ms

This is the time when I want to grab the next person I see and kiss them
Because you never know when it'll be your last
When all hope breaks loose
And you live life for this moment alone

My face is hot from crying
These useless tears
Because they fix nothing
They don't solve world hunger, they don't stop the world from spinning
And they don't bring you back
From the grave

So I throw my arms out, daring someone to grasp them
And fix this, fix the pain, fix anything!